Our Great Prophet Omega

Prophet Omega's latest pronouncements

Omega Speak: Direct Quotes | Omega's Schedule for World Domination

Omega's Top 5 Commandments

  1. Thou shalt not use Comic Sans.
  2. Thou shalt not wear plaid with polka dots.
  3. Thou shalt not use the word "synergy" unironically.
  4. Thou shalt not eat a sandwich that's been sitting out since the Clinton administration.
  5. Thou shalt not use a flip phone.

Stay tuned for further instructions.

Or don't. We won't judge you.

Back to the schedule