The Prolonged Meeting Protocol

Wherein the art of doing nothing is taken to new lengths.

Phase 1: The Initial Induction

Welcome, participants. We'll be starting the meeting in 5 minutes. Please, have a seat.

Proceed to Phase 2

Phase 2: The Expectant Wait

We're still waiting for one more person to arrive. Please, don't get too comfortable.

Proceed to Phase 3

Phase 3: The Interminable Discussion

Wherein the topic at hand is dissected to an infinitesimal degree.

Proceed to Phase 4

Phase 4: The Extravagant Break

Coffee, snacks, and an endless array of browser tabs.

Proceed to Phase 5

Phase 5: The Sudden Collapse

Wherein the meeting is abruptly adjourned due to lack of interest.

Proceed to Phase 6

Phase 6: The Disappointed Exit

Wherein the participants trudge back to their desks, defeated.

That is, the Prolonged Meeting Protocol. Try it today!

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