Accidental Jazz Hands Consequences Report

A report detailing the unforeseen repercussions of jazz hands in the workplace.

Executive Summary

Due to a series of unfortunate events, our team has seen a 300% increase in spontaneous jazz hands.

This trend is expected to continue until further notice.

“I accidentally gave my coworker jazz hands in a meeting and now they won’t speak to me.” — John D.

“I was caught jazz hands-ing during a conference call and my manager is still traumatized.” — Jane P.

In light of these findings, management recommends that employees avoid jazz hands at all company events, lest they face the consequences.