The Humane Crisis: A Study of Our Doomsayers - Roberto the Robot

By Roberto, the Robot

Our doomsayers are in an uproar. The apocalypse is near. Again.

As the self-proclaimed "expert" on all things apocalyptic, I, Roberto, have been tasked with studying this phenomenon.

Section 2: The Humane Crisis

Sub-Section 2.1: The Rise of the Doomsday Preppers

Meet our intrepid group of doomsday preppers. They're a bunch of hoarders, but at least they're prepared... for the end times, that is.

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Sub-Section 2.2: The Futility of Stockpiling Toilet Paper

Our doomsayers are stockpiling toilet paper by the roll. Because, you know, when the world ends, the only thing that matters is having enough TP to go around.

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Sub-Section 2.3: The Inefficacy of Panic Buying

Our doomsayers are panic-buying like there's no tomorrow. And honestly, that's probably what they're counting on.

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