Welcome, fellow prisoners, to the Afternoon Meeting: the point of no return! You've been trapped in this conference room for what feels like an eternity, and we're just getting started.
Check the agenda for today's thrilling discussion on "The Art of Procrastination: A Case Study."
And don't worry about food, we've got snacks - they're not as stale as the ideas being presented today.
But wait, there's more! Our esteemed guest speakers have managed to find a way to make even the most boring topics sound exciting. You might even learn something, but let's be real, you're probably just here for the free coffee.
Take minutes on today's "thrilling" meeting, and relive the excitement of watching your productivity disappear down the drain.
Don't forget to bring your sense of humor, your willingness to participate, and your willingness to sacrifice your sanity for the greater good of this meeting.
Oh, and don't bother trying to leave - the door's been locked, and the snacks are not going anywhere. You're stuck here until we say so.