The company is on the brink of collapse. We're talking imminent doom. But fear not, dear employees, for we have a plan.
Phase 1: The Great PanicThe employees are on the brink of collapse. Like, literally. We're talking fainting, hyperventing, fainting, hyperventing... You get the picture.
Our CEO is on the roof, shouting into a megaphone, while our interns are running around like headless chickens, trying to find the coffee machine.
Someone, somewhere, needs to get a grip.
We're going to need to make some tough choices. Like, who gets to keep their chair. Or who has to take a pay cut. Or, you know, who has to be eaten by wolves.
Phase 2: The Great Reorganization