Stealthy Steve

Stealthy Steve is a master of disguise, a sultan of subterfuge, and a ninja of ninja-ness. He's been known to infiltrate the highest of high-security facilities and pilfer the most valuable of valuable assets.

By day, he's a mild-mannered accountant. By night, he's a black-ops agent, sneaking into the shadows, leaving a trail of confusion and bewilderment in his wake.

But don't be fooled, he's not just a one-man band of mayhem. He's got a support team of expert hackers, code breakers, and pastry chefs, all working tirelessly to make the world a more interesting place, one covert operation at a time.

Learn more about his illustrious career in this exclusive, heavily-redacted, and completely-not-true timeline.

(Note: The timeline link leads to a page filled with ridiculous, out-of-context historical dates and events, each accompanied by a small, unflattering image of a different Stealthy Steve.)