Q: What is team-building, anyway?
A: It's a thing we do to make you feel slightly less miserable in the office.
Q: What's the most effective team-building activity?
A: The answer is, clearly, "Trust Falls." Just ask your IT department.
Q: Can I just send a nice "I'm sorry I'm late" email instead of attending?
A: No. That's not how it works. That's just being a jerk. Emails are for when you're actually trying to be a jerk.