MEETING OF THE TYRANTS

AGENDA: 2023-03-16

09:00 AM - Arrival and Self-Appraisal

• Arrive fashionably late to assert dominance
• Spend 5 minutes admiring own reflection in window

09:15 AM - Power Struggle

• Debate whose name is most prominent on the meeting room wall
• Negotiate for more prominent placement at the conference table

10:00 AM - World Domination Schemes

• Discuss plans for global takeover, one tyrant at a time
• Debate the merits of various doomsday devices

12:00 PM - Lunch Break (Optional)

• Grab a sandwich, eat it with a fork and knife
• Stare intensely at colleagues while eating

01:00 PM - Tyrant of the Month Award

• Present awards for various forms of megalomania
• Receive nominations for the next award

02:00 PM - Conclusion

• Summarize key points in a series of monosyllabic decrees
• Dismiss meeting with a wave of the hand

03:00 PM - Adjourn

• Leave the conference room without looking back
• Return to individual offices to plot and scheme

04:00 PM - After-Party (By Invitation Only)

• Attend by invitation only (hint: it's not an invitation)
• Engage in clandestine activities and whispered plots