Alert: 44 minutes of productivity lost due to excessive snacking.
Reason: Uncontrollable craving for Nacho Cheese Doritos.
Recommendations:
- Seek immediate medical attention.
- Replace snacks with healthier options (but let's be real, who needs those).
- Call a cheese therapist for emergency guidance.
Additional Resources:
- Cheese Recovery Program - A 12-step program for those seeking cheese freedom.
- Nacho Support Group - Share your struggles with others who understand.