Q: What happens if I'm faced with a ninja?
Q: What's the best way to defend against an angry mob of accountants?
Defending Against an Angry Mob of Accountants
Q: Can I use my baseball bat as a makeshift snow shovel?
No. Don't try that. It's a bad idea.
Q: How do I use my baseball bat as a microphone?
Using Your Baseball Bat as a Microphone
Q: What's the best way to deflect a thrown pie?
Use your wits, not your bat. But if you must use your bat, make sure to wear gloves.
Q: What's the connection between baseball bats and existential dread?
There isn't one. But if you're experiencing existential dread, try staring at the wall for a while.