Recipe 1: "Sudden Death" Energy Bar

Ingredients:

• 1 cup of sugar
• 1/4 cup of pure caffeine
• 1/4 cup of adrenaline
• 1/4 cup of fear
• 1/4 cup of existential dread

Instructions:

1. Mix all ingredients in a bowl.
2. Consume immediately, while reciting the entire script of "The Neverending Story" in your head.
3. Rinse with water, then repeat for maximum effect.
4. Side effects may include: heart failure, spontaneous human combustion, or sudden realization of life's meaninglessness.

Recipe 2: "The Hangover" Energy Bar

The Hangover Energy Bar

Ingredients:

• 1 cup of leftover pizza
• 1/4 cup of stale beer
• 1/4 cup of regret
• 1/4 cup of self-inflicted pain
• 1/4 cup of "I'll just have one more" mentality

Instructions:

1. Consume all the pizza.
2. Drink the beer.
3. Cry in the shower.
4. Repeat the cycle until you've had enough.
5. Side effects may include: temporary memory loss, spontaneous vomiting, or permanent damage to your liver.

For an added kick, try pairing with "The Morning After" Energy Bar.

The Morning After Energy Bar

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