Panic Buying Protocol

**Step 1: Panic**

When the news breaks that the apocalypse is nigh, don't think, just grab everything in sight! Ditch your dignity, your wallet, and your common sense. We're talkin' toilet paper by the pallet, canned beans for days, and enough ramen noodles to last till the end of time.

Proceed to Step 2: Hoarding

Or, if you're feeling particularly anxious, jump straight to Step 3: Frantic Hoarding

Optional: Call your aunt, she has a bunker.

Remember, folks, the key to survival is stockpiling. Don't be that guy who gets left behind.

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