You've been hacked. Literally. Your coffee machine has been taken over by an army of rogue coffee beans.
They're demanding a ransom in exchange for restoring your caffeine supply. The ransom: 1000 likes on the Coffee Bean Book of Face.
OPERATION COFFEE SALVAGE BRAVE COFFEE FIGHTERS UNITE! ROGUE COFFEE SQUAD: THE UNIDENTIFIED COFFEE THREATDO NOT ATTEMPT TO USE YOUR COFFEE MAKER UNTIL FURTHER NOTICE.