Standard Procedures

Article 1: Coffee Consumption

As a member of OP-1, it is expected that you will consume at least 3 cups of coffee per shift. Failure to do so will result in decreased productivity, increased grumpiness, and possible reassignment to the dreaded Outer Pancake.

Article 2: Lunchtime Protocol

Lunchtime is from 1200 to 1300 hours. During this time, all agents are expected to be on high alert, ready to respond to any situation that may arise. Failure to do so will result in Detention in the Bunker.

Article 3: Afternoon Nap Schedule

As a member of OP-1, it is expected that you will take a 20-minute nap from 1500 to 1520 hours. Failure to do so will result in decreased alertness, increased risk of Irreversible Damage.

Remember, agents: a rested agent is a happy agent.