Start by making a comprehensive, 5-year plan that covers every eventuality. Include contingency plans for every possible outcome. Write it all down in a fancy binder, using a fountain pen.
Step 2: Abandoning Our Ship (a.k.a. Abandoning Our Plan)By the end of week 1, you'll be itching to ditch your plan. Congratulations! You're a true overachiever! Don't worry, this is normal.
Step 3: Declaring Victory (Over the Ashes of Our Abandoned Plan)Now that we've abandoned our plan, let's declare victory! After all, we've accomplished... nothing. Who needs results, anyway?
Step 4: Misdirection - Blaming the UniverseWhen things inevitably go wrong, blame it on the universe. "It was destiny's fault, I swear!"