Phase 4: Caffeine Coma
You've made it to Phase 4 of the Monday Blues Recovery Plan! This is where things get really interesting.
Step 1: Crash and Burn
Drink 5-10 cups of coffee in one sitting. No, really, drink them. It's not just a suggestion.
- Stare blankly at a wall for 30 minutes.
- Try to remember what day it is.
- Wonder how you've managed to survive this long without a decent amount of caffeine.
Step 2: Crash Recovery
Take a 20-minute power nap, or until the caffeine kicks in.
- Crawl back to your desk, still half-asleep.
- Stare at your computer screen, try to remember what you're doing.
- Realize you've been staring at the same line of code for 3 hours.
- Google for "how to adult" results.
- Call your mom, tell her you're doing great.
- Buy more coffee.