Today's Schedule:
9:00 AM - Wake up, still in bed
9:30 AM - Stumble to the kitchen, pour self a bowl of cereal, wonder why it's not as tasty as last night's pizza
10:00 AM - Spend an hour scrolling through social media, comparing life to that one friend from high school who's doing better than you
12:00 PM - Lunchtime! Eat a whole pizza by yourself, alone in the office
1:00 PM - Afternoon slump. Take a nap. Wake up 10 minutes later, confused, and wondering if you're still dreaming
3:00 PM - More scrolling. This time, wonder if you're actually awake or just in a lucid dreamstate