Mandate 5677: Mandatory Monday Morning Routine

You are hereby mandated to wake up at 6:00 AM sharp. Any deviation from this schedule will result in severe penalties, including but not limited to:

• Excessive coffee consumption
• Exposure to morning sunlight without sunscreen
• Inability to achieve peak productivity levels

Mandate 5678: Mandatory Monday Afternoon Nap Mandate 5679: Mandatory Monday Evening Social Media Detox