Officially Mandated Task: "Phantom Task 9000"

By order of the Monday Mandates, you are hereby directed to:

1. Fill out form 27-B/3 in triplicate, using a #2 pencil, and submit it to the Department of Redundancy.
2. Attend a mandatory training session on "The Art of Doing Nothing" to be certified in the ancient art of procrastination.
3. Develop a 20-page business case for the implementation of "Yet Another Meeting Initiative" to ensure its feasibility.

Failure to comply will result in a sternly worded letter and possible termination of employment. Don't say we didn't warn you.

For further information, please refer to:

• Phantom Task 9001: The Next Generation
• Mandate Clarification Committee: Because You Clearly Didn't Understand