It's no secret that the world is running out of pencils. We've seen it in the news, on social media, and even on the streets. People are hoarding, stockpiling, and downright stealing each other's pencils. It's a crisis of epic proportions.
That's why we, the Monday Mandate Council, have decreed that all citizens shall carry a minimum of 3 pencils at all times. Yes, you heard that right. 3 pencils. Not 2, not 4, 3. Don't bother questioning, just accept it.
But wait, there's more! As of today, any establishment found to be not providing a complimentary pencil with every purchase shall be subject to a fine of 1000 units of our special brand of disappointment.
We understand that pencils mayประกnot be your thing. That's okay! We've got you covered. For those who refuse to carry pencils, we've developed a range of alternative writing tools:
Pencils 2.0: The Pencil-Phone App
Pen and Paper: The Retro Alternative
Typewriters and Tape Machines: Because Why Not?
We'll be watching you, citizens. Carry your 3 pencils.
Report a Pencil-Related Offense Mandate 5: The One Where We Demand More Coffee