Technique 2: Mastering the Art of Doing Absolutely Nothing

Step 1: Set Your Alarm Clock to 'Snooze'

By setting your alarm clock to 'Snooze', you'll never actually have to get out of bed. This will allow you to master the art of hitting the snooze button repeatedly, a true epicurean technique.

Step 2: Create a To-Do List with Only Irrelevant Tasks

Write down things like 'Watch paint dry' or 'Stare at the wall'. This will train your brain to focus on the utterly unimportant.

Step 3: Develop a Strong Affinity for Procrastination

Practice the art of finding excuses to do nothing. Claim you're 'researching' something for hours, or that you're 'reorganizing' your sock drawer.