What is Convergence 9999?
We're glad you asked! Convergence 9999 is an event of cosmic significance where parallel timelines converge into a single point in space-time, causing widespread temporal chaos and a 99.99% chance of spontaneous combustion. Don't worry, though; it's just a Tuesday.
What are the symptoms of Convergence 9999?
Symptoms include but are not limited to:
How do I survive Convergence 9999?
We recommend wearing a tin foil hat, consuming copious amounts of coffee, and having a good lawyer on standby. Also, don't forget to tip your waiter.
Will there be a Convergence 9999 survival kit available?
We'll get right on that. In the meantime, you can try making your own using the following materials:
What if I'm not prepared for Convergence 9999?
Don't worry, friend! You can always join the Convergence Resistance, a secret society of experts who've mastered the art of temporal adaptation. Click here for more information.
Or, if you're feeling adventurous, try Convergence Simulation to practice your survival skills in a safe, virtual environment.