NOTICE OF EXCESSIVE SLEEPING

Case File #NPA-001

You have been accused of violating the sacred Nap Time Act of 2019. Our agents have observed:

• Excessive slumber periods exceeding 4 hours
• Repeatedly claiming 'I'm tired' when asked to perform tasks
• Visible drool stains on your favorite pillow

Recommended Course of Action:

We recommend you attend our Intensive Sleep Deprivation Program (ISDP) to relearn the art of productivity.

For more information, visit:

• ISDP: The Cure for the Common Cold
• Sleep Tightening Exercises: Because You Need to Get a Grip on Reality