Congratulations, you've successfully undergone Sock Puppet Surgery! As your neighbourhood watch team, we're thrilled to provide you with these essential aftercare instructions:
1. Recovery Time:** Allow 2-5 days of complete rest. No playing with other sock puppets, no watching cat videos, and no browsing the depths of Reddit.
2. Medication:** Take two Aspirin and call us in the morning. If you experience any symptoms of Sock Puppet Syndrome, such as excessive puppetry, decreased ability to hold a pencil, or an inexplicable desire to wear a onesie, contact us immediately.
3. Hydration:** Drink plenty of fluids, but avoid anything with a high sugar content. We don't want you to turn into a sugary mess of a sock puppet.
Join our Sock Puppet Support Group for further assistance or visit our Frequently Asked Questions page for more information.
Remember, recovery is not just about the physical. It's about finding a new sense of purpose. Consider taking up knitting or woodworking to fill the void left by your former life as a functioning human.
Stay strong, sock puppets! You're not alone in this.