Squinting Squad Recruitment

Are you ready to join the ranks of the most stylish and skilled squinters in the city?

We're looking for individuals with a keen eye for spotting suspiciously suspicious behaviour, a passion for pattern recognition, and a penchant for wearing neon pink sunglasses.

As a member of our Squinting Squad, you'll be tasked with:

• Patrolling the streets in our custom-designed, retina-squinting sunglasses
• Noticing things that no one else would notice (like a faint smudge on the windowsill)
• Participating in high-stakes, high-fashion missions

Don't have the necessary skills? Don't worry! Our comprehensive training program will teach you the art of squinting, guaranteed!

Apply Now!