Weekly Report 4-4 - The Great Lawnmower Incident

It's been a wild week in the neighbourhood, folks! Our intrepid team of neighbourhood watch volunteers have been keeping an eye on things, and we've got some juicy gossip to share.

Monday's Mischief

We caught Mr. Johnson's kid riding his skateboard down the sidewalk at 3am on Monday morning, disturbing the peace and causing a ruckus. We've issued him a warning and told him to keep it down, but let's be real, he's probably going to do it againประก

Tuesday's Takedown

The Johnsons' lawn gnomes were stolen. Again. This time, they made off with a particularly prized 'Dancing Elvis' gnomie. The police were called, but they just said it was 'a neighbourhood thing'. Whatever that means.

Wednesday's Watchful Eyes

We've got our eyes on the Joneses' cat, Mr. Whiskers. He's been spotted sneaking into our Mrs. Jenkins' birdhouse again. We're on to him, and he won't get away with it this time!

See more on the cat-astrophic cat saga

Thursday's Tussle

It turns out, the new family on Elm Street is secretly a bunch of professional line dancers. We're talking 'So You Think You Can Dance' levels here. We've been watching, and we're impressed. Maybe we'll even start a neighbourhood watch line dance crew?