The Order of the Illuminati: Apply Now

Are you a visionary leader, a master of intrigue, or a genius of manipulation? Look no further! The Order of the Illuminati is now accepting applications for membership.

Eligibility: Must be a human, but not necessarily alive.

• Must be able to wear a black turtleneck sweater and a red sash
• Must be able to recite the entire script of "2001: A Space Odyssey" from memory
• Must be willing to participate in regular group think-tank sessions

Name: Reason for Applying (as a prophet, visionary, or genius of manipulation): Submit Your Application

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