Elite Subscription: FAQ

Q: What is Elite Subscription?

A: It's the only subscription service that's actually worth your time and money. We're talking exclusive access to our underground bunker, personalized concierge service, and a complimentary side of existential dread.

Q: How do I sign up for Elite Subscription?

A: Just click here and fill out the form. Don't bother trying to escape, we've already got your info.

Q: Can I cancel my subscription at any time?

A: Ha! You think you can just waltz in here and waltz out? Our contracts are as ironclad as the bunker's blast doors. You're committed, friend.

Q: What's the point of the bunker's neon aesthetic?

A: It's a mood enhancer, duh. Also, it's a great way to blind your neighbors and neighbors' neighbors with our bright, pulsing lights.