Confessing to a Higher Power (That Never Listens)

Section 3: Accuse The System

Step 1: Identify the System's Sins

1. They took away our right to wear neon-colored jumpsuits in public.
2. They forced us to watch an endless loop of elevator music.
3. They made us drink tap water that tastes like sadness.

Step 2: Blame the System for Our Problems

1. The System is responsible for my crippling sense of purpose.
2. The System made me watch an entire season of 'The Bachelor' in one sitting.
3. It's the System's fault I can't remember what day it is.

Step 3: Develop a Plan to Take Down The System

1. Organize a group hug for the System's servers.
2. Start a support group for those who've lost their sense of humor.
3. Write a strongly-worded letter to the System's CEO (who is probably just a cat).