Server 1: Where the Sarcasm Overflows

Warning: Do not attempt to reboot this server. The engineers who built it are on vacation and the backup servers are running on a diet of kale and essential oils.

Current Status: Overloaded with existential dread and poorly written code.

Server Administrators: Bob, Dave, and Chuck (in no particular order).

Subsystems:

For any issues, please contact our Brokenness Department.

Or just press the big red button below, but don't say we didn't warn you...