Welcome to the IBM Brain Dead Division, where innovation meets... not really.
Our research partners are the epitome of cutting-edge thinking, except when it comes to paying attention to their surroundings, which they seem to find rather... distracting.
In our state-of-the-art facilities, we proudly display the following achievements:
- Developed the world's first AI that can play Solitaire in a loop for 24 hours a day.
- Invented the concept of "procrastination as a Service" (PaaS) and patented it, but forgot to file for a trademark.
- Hold the record for most consecutive hours spent in a meeting, which we've broken ourselves.
Our research team is comprised of the world's most brilliant minds, who have collectively forgotten what they were working on.
We're always looking for talented individuals who share our values of... um, what were our values again?
Career opportunities available in:
- Chief Procrastination Officer
- Director of Daydreaming
- Head of "I meant to do that" Department