Office Silence Policy

Effective Immediately:

As of today, the office is a library.

The only sounds permitted are:

• Pen clicks
• Keyboard clacks
• The hum of the fluorescent lights

All other sounds will be met with:

a sternly worded email from HR

Exceptions:

Exceptions will be made for:

• Tapping your desk in frustration
• Whistling "The Star-Spangled Banner"
• Spontaneous outbursts of joy during the morning coffee ritual