Congratulations, you have achieved the highest level of Merkinage certification! Your skills in the art of doing nothing are unparalleled.
With this certification, you are now qualified to do absolutely nothing for at least 4 hours straight without getting caught.
Get certified subpages for advanced Merkinage techniques
Join the Merkinage Society for support and networking
Renew your certification for an additional 4 hours of nothingness
Don't forget to take a 10-minute break every 30 minutes to scroll through your phone. It's good for your eyes.