Warning: do not attempt to recreate this sauce at home. It's extremely hazardous to your health, your relationships, and your kitchen.
1 cup of regret
1/2 cup of existential dread
3 tablespoons of disappointment
1 teaspoon of despair
Combine all ingredients in a saucepan over low heat.
Stir counterclockwise for precisely 17 minutes while contemplating the meaninglessness of life.
Serve immediately, garnished with a sprinkle of apathy.