The Dark Dinner Theater

Where the Food is Always Overcooked

Welcome, brave souls, to the most terrifying dining experience in the multiverse. Here, the chef's specialty is not just cooking, but also the art of making you question your life choices.

Our menu features a variety of dishes, each one more bewildering than the last:

• Steamed Fish in a Blender
• The Meatloaf of Despair
• Spaghetti Tossed in a Pit of Desperation
• Creamy Mushroom Soup of the Damned

Don't say we didn't warn you...

Our specials tonight include:

• The Abyssal Souffle (comes with a side of existential dread)
• The Souffle of Soul-Crushing Disappointment (served with a dollop of regret)

Don't forget to tip your server, but not too much, because, let's be real, they're just here for the free food.