The eternal conundrum of the universe: the Schrödinger's Cat Paradox of Identity, where every time you try to define yourself, you simultaneously create 47 alternate versions of yourself.
Or, you know, the classic Grandfather Paradox of Procrastination, where every decision you make creates a new timeline where you've already done the dishes.
The Grandfather Paradox of Procrastination is where you've been putting off that one thing, and now you_goals
The Paradox of the Kraken is where every time you look in the mirror, you see a giant tentacled sea monster staring back at you, wondering if you're still a good person.
Or, if you're feeling particularly existential, check out The Paradox of the Kraken Self, where every time you try to eat a bowl of cereal, you simultaneously realize that it's just a bowl of cereal.
And, if you're in the mood for something a bit more...absurdist, try The Paradox of Quantum Flapdoodle, where every time you try to decide what to eat for breakfast, a new reality branch is created where you've eaten 17 different breakfastschartInstance.
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