Paradoxical Pharmaceuticals - Antithetical Analgesics

Welcome to the Antithetical Analgesics, where we specialize in painkillers that don't actually kill pain.

Our Best-Selling Antidotes:

• Minimally Effective Morphine - For when you want to take the least amount of painkiller possible.
• Over-the-Counter OxyCooone - Because who needs a doctor when you can just take what you want?
• Paradoxical Pharmacist - Where the pharmacist is also the paradox.

Our Specialties:

We also offer:

• Neurotic Nihilist Treatment Plan - For when you want to be depressed but not really.
• Chronic Contrarian Support Group - Where you can complain about how things aren't as good as they used to be.
• Existential Exasperation Counseling - For when the meaning of life is too much to bear.

Don't forget to check out our Surrealist Souvenirs for a unique gift for that someone special in your life.