Paranoid Penalties Insurance

Insurance Quotes

Because you're probably going to need it.

Our rates are:

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Testimonials

"I bought insurance from them and lived to regret it." - John D.

"I'm still alive, and so is my family, thanks to Paranoid Penalties Insurance!" - Karen S.

"I got a great rate, but my therapist says I have a problem." - Dave K.

FAQs

Q: What if I die in a freak accident while skydiving?

A: We've got you covered.

Q: What if I get a rare disease that only affects me?

A: You'll still get 10% off your premium.

Q: What if I get a tattoo of our logo?

A: You'll get 10% off your premium, plus a free t-shirt.

Our Team

Meet our team of highly trained professionals:

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