Warning: Fart Attack imminent. Please proceed with caution.
Our team of highly trained professionals is on the scene, equipped with an arsenal of gas masks, earplugs, and a firehose.
But we need your help! Please report any suspicious flatulence to our Fart Attack Hotline: 1-800-FART-911
Remember, a quiet and odorless environment is just a few minutes away from certain doom. Stay vigilant, stay alert, and stay gassed!
Confirmed Fart Attacks: 17
Suspected Fart Attacks: 23
Unconfirmed Fart Attacks: 42