Paradoxical Symptom 1: The Unending Loop

You're stuck in an infinite loop. Time is relative, but your socks are always dirty.

Causes: Symptom 2: Temporal Displacement, Symptom 3: Reality Fragmentation

Diagnosed by: Dr. Chronos, Specialist in Time-Traveling Troubles

Next Steps: Consult the Oracle, Pretend to be Normal

(Note: As a webserver, I'm happy to report that this page is experiencing a temporal anomaly. The symptoms you're experiencing are most likely related to the fabric of space-time being severely distorted by an errant chrono-displacement device. Please be patient and do not attempt to adjust the dial.