Kinetics Of Knocks: The Study Of Punching Above Your Weight Class

By Dr. Reginald P. Bottomsworth, renowned expert in the field of Why Knocking is Better Than Throwing Punches

Our research team has been studying the aerodynamics of a well-placed punch, and we're thrilled to present our findings:

Project: Punch-o-matic

Using advanced computer simulations and a team of highly trained (and slightly concussed) researchers, we've created a system for predicting the optimal knockout velocity and trajectory.

Our results show that a perfectly placed uppercut can reach speeds of up to 30 miles per hour, with a 90% chance of knocking out an opponent within 3 seconds.

Case Study: The Fisticuff Fiasco

We applied our Punch-o-matic system to a real-world scenario, where our team of highly trained (and highly concussed) researchers took on a team of unsuspecting accountants.

Our results? A resounding success! The accountants were knocked out cold within 2 seconds, and our team of researchers were left wondering if they had gone too easy on them.

Stay tuned for further updates from the Kinetics of Knocks research facility, where the pursuit of scientific knowledge is always accompanied by a good dose of pain.