Section 5: The Art of Extreme Procrastination

Subsection 5a: Mastering the Ancient Art of Doing Absolutely Nothing

As a master of the craft, you must learn to harness the power of distraction. This subsection will guide you through the ancient techniques of:

• Perfecting the art of scrolling through memes on a 4-hour loop
• Mastery of the 5-second pause between tabs
• Unlearning the concept of productivity
• Developing a keen sense of spatial awareness for your dirty dishes
• Sub-subsection 1: Mastering the art of watching cat videos for 3 hours straight
Learn more about Sub-subsection 1.
View the appendix for bonus procrastination techniques.