The 5-Minute Stare: A Proven Technique for Maximum Procrastination

Are you tired of actually doing work? Do you yearn for the freedom to simply stare at a wall for hours on end? Look no further than the 5-Minute Stare!

Also known as "The Art of Purposeful Inactivity," this revolutionary technique involves staring intensely at a fixed point for exactly 5 minutes, after which you are free to return to your regular routine.

Benefits:

Increased productivity: By doing nothing, you'll be able to focus on the task at hand with laser-like clarity.
Improved mental health: The thrill of doing nothing is a powerful mood-booster!
Enhanced creativity: Sometimes, the best ideas come from a blank slate (of mind).

But don't just take our word for it! Read on to learn more about this groundbreaking technique:

The Science Behind the 5-Minute Stare:

The Great Wall of Silence

Or, if you're feeling adventurous:

The 1000-Yard Stare: A variation for the truly committed

And for our most advanced practitioners:

The Zen of the Blank Page: A 5-Minute Stare for the Truly Enlightened

You are now ready to begin your 5-Minute Stare. Remember: the goal is not to achieve something, but to merely exist in a state of suspended animation.