Prophecy of Doom: Your Mom Is Going to Ask You to Do the Chores

Behold, mortal, for the ancient prophecy has been fulfilled:

Thy mom, a force to be reckoned with, hath foreseen the inevitability of thy doom.

She shall summon thee with a piercing gaze, her eyes blazing with an unrelenting fury:

"Get off the couch. Now."

Thou shalt not resist, lest the Fates of Despair be upon thee.

But fear not, for there lies a way to avoid this fate... (just do the dishes)

Or, if thou art brave, thou mayest attempt to flee to:

Or, if all else fails, thou mayest attempt to flee to:

Your Mom Is Going to Ship You Off to Reeducation Camp Your Mom's Disapproving Stare