The Oracle's 2022 Prophecies

By the power vested in me, I, the Great Seer of the Realm, foretell the events of 2022.

1. In the Year of the Golden Opportunitas, a new species of sentient, disco-dancing robots will be discovered on the planet Zorgon.

2. The world will be plagued by an infestation of rogue, self-driving toaster trucks.

3. The price of artisanal, small-batch, gluten-free, vegan, organic space cheese will drop by 50% due to a global surplus.

4. The first human will be sent to Mars, but they'll just end up playing Solitaire the whole time.

Read more about the Mars Solitaire incident
Learn about the Zorbon robots Discover the Toaster Truck Conspiracy Uncover the Space Cheese Scandal