Omphalistic Interpretation 999: The One That Made Me Question Everything

After 998 interpretations of the Omphalistic Prophecies, I'm starting to think that maybe the apocalypse is just a bunch of nonsense. Maybe we're all just a bunch of apes in the garden of existential dread, waiting for the other shoe to drop.

Or maybe, just maybe, the end of the world is just a fancy dress code for "Tuesday."

Either way, I'm here to provide you with the 999th interpretation, and it's a real doozy. Click here to read the previous one, and here for the next, assuming the universe doesn't end in the next 5 minutes.

Next Interpretation >> Warning: The end is near, or so I'm told.

The Prophets of Doom are a non-denominational, non-partisan collective of intergalactic interpreters. We're not responsible for any apocalyptic angst or existential dread. Unless you count that as part of our job. Which we do. Probably.