The world as we know it shall end in a blaze of glory, as the Zealot returns, riding a mechanical unicorn made of pure, unadulterated awesomeness. The skies will turn a deep shade of plaid as the fabric of reality unravels.
Read Prophecy 10: The Great Bureaucratic UprisingGlobal economic collapse. Widespread destruction of all things beige. Increased likelihood of spontaneous combustion in areas with poor air quality.
Read Prophecy 8: The Rise of the Beige ResistanceThe Zealot shall demand an endless supply of artisanal, small-batch, organic, gluten-free donuts. The world shall be remade in the image of the Zealot, with a 3-to-1 ratio of Instagram influencers to actual artists.
Read Prophecy 11: The Great Donut Inflation