PROPHET ARCHON'S PROPHECIES:
  • **The Donut Holes shall rise, but only on Tuesdays.**
  • **The Great Pink Glaze shall flow from the skies, but only after 3 PM EST.**
  • **The Fjord of Eternal Bacon shall be filled, but only for those who have eaten 17 donuts in one sitting.**
  • **A portal shall open, but only for those who know the secret password: 'ILoveDonuts'.**

For more divinely inspired prophecies, visit:

**Remember, mortals, the power of donuts is mightier than the sword!**

**-Prophet Archon, Supreme Leader of the Prophets of the Donut Holes**