As a public service, we're providing you with this information. Because, you know, you're probably going to need it.
Don't bother trying to contact us after the apocalypse. We'll be too busy trying to survive.
Stay informed, not entertained.
Due to unforeseen circumstances, the apocalypse is coming. Like, it's basically here.
Emergency Preparations are in order. Don't bother.
We will not be providing refunds or guarantees of survival. That's just not how the apocalypse works.
What Should I Do Now? is a good resource for the faint of heart.
Stay tuned for further updates, or don't. We're not really sure.
— A Prophetic Announcement
As a public service, we're providing you with this information. Because, you know, you're probably going to need it.
Don't bother trying to contact us after the apocalypse. We'll be too busy trying to survive.
Stay informed, not entertained.